Tuesday, October 18, 2005
sometimes i try too hard. actually most of the time.
i try too hard to keep things the way they are,
do things the way i think works best and
i always take things too too seriously.
but because i really treasure them.
that is why i try so hard...
and when i try so hard, i hope to see the appreciation
in my love language.
Is this selfish?
It's funny. when friends come into such situations as i do, i can see everything so clearly. everything becomes so simple. and i can be rational and calm, totally unlike how i would have reacted. i cannot practise what i preach when it comes to similar incidents.
I wish...
i was more callous,
in the mildest mildest sense of the word.
so that i do not have to defend or fight whenever i feel
those self-imagined threats.
threats which makes me feel like i am losing the things and people i treasure.
Why can't i just let things go...and let people change.
Why do i always doubt the ones we thought we love most.
which makes me think - are they really the ones we love, as we proclaimed?
the little oven posted at 8:58 AM
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